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  • Writer's pictureOlivia Corvisart

The Wrongheadedness of "Penis Envy"

Why do you guys want a big dick?

Seriously asking the question here because it seems to be a focus that spans the human male lifetime and is at near-obsession levels. Ask Reddit regularly has threads dedicated to it. I get told way more often than I'd like that I should want/desire huge, veiny, monstrosities of peens.

Fun Fact: A larger and longer penis is not more pleasurable in the bedroom. The man wielding it is the single determinant factor as to whether or not a penis is pleasurable.

My personal preference: Average with nice girth. Anything larger can be painful. A vagina is only about 3-4 inches deep when unaroused and on average 5.5 inches deep when aroused. There are women who are outliers who deepen to 7 inches just as there are men with penises of 12 inches, but these are exceptions rather than the rule. I have far too many guys who apologize for their penis size. Like your height or eye color, it cannot be helped so why apologize for something that is out of your control? Instead, focus your attention on HOW TO USE your whole body in the act of pleasure.

Published in 2016, it is known that heterosexual women have fewer orgasms when engaging in sex with men. Trust has nothing to do with penis size and everything to do with a lack of communication, laziness, and a lack of curiosity about what pleases women. Those penis pumps and pills in the margins of PornHub aren't going to solve the anorgasmia of heterosexual women. You have to get vulnerable and start talking!

I am gonna show a little love to the average Joe and say your Johnsons are the Toyota Camry of peens. You can fold the backseats down and get a 60" flat screen tv in, skis, and even a queen-size IKEA mattress (seriously...I helped move a friend this way)! Any position a woman wants to try can be done with an average-sized penis. If you learn how to use your fingers, tongue, and toys then you can ensure your partner gets multiple orgasms off before you've had your one.

Discussions around toxic masculinity are all over social media and I for one am glad that they are happening. You men ARE NOT OK and yeah, I do think this move toward men being allowed to be fully human and shaming those who prop up the toxic system is a beautiful thing. I also think this obsession with having a giant cock comes from two places (1) porn and (2) racial stereotypes both of which are poison to men of any race/culture. There is no correlation between penis size and race, Guys, just as there is no correlation between race and height (height is based on a genetic + nutrition combo in case you were wondering).

At the end of the day, celebrate your body and love the skin you're in because all of it is beautiful, sensual, as well as pleasure receiving and giving!


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